A Blended Lockdown

Two weeks ago my kids returned to school. Hopefully for good this time. I say this because I want them to have no disruptions, particularly for my boy who is now in his last year at primary.

School is of course a little different for both my munchkins now. Society has got used to face masks, hand sanitiser and frowning upon people who get in your personal space, so what would have been an alien environment twelve months ago is pretty much accepted these days. How times have changed!

When lockdown started it was all a little bizarre. Daunting, exhausting, nerve-wracking and dare I say exciting (which I know sounds sick), we approached it with a sense of trepidation and intrigue. How were we going to cope?

 

Is time really the greatest healer?

When embarking on my blog-writing journey I was warned this would happen. I was told that there would be a time when suddenly the writing would cease; that the material I have swimming around my brain would stop and my creative flow would vanish. Those who told me this were spot on.

Why have I been so quiet? Well, the answer is simple really. I am happy and content. My little blended unit is happy and content too. Yes, we have had the challenges of lockdown and I suppose, when I get a chance to reflect on it I’ll get hammering at the keys again. That blog will come. It is inevitable.

But there was one thing recently that meant I had to write again. I had to get my feelings down in written form. They say time is the biggest healer. Well, I am not so sure. Sometimes time can conjure more questions rather than provide a sense of closure, particularly for my boy.

“Life Is Hard Sometimes, Isn’t It Dad?”

They say nothing is more stressful than moving house. From the outset you’re worried whether house offers will be accepted, that buyer’s of your own house won’t pull out, that surveys come back with no nasty surprises and that solicitors do their jobs properly. My fiancée and I managed to overcome these hurdles with relative ease, finally finding out that we had exchanged contracts waiting for our suitcases to arrive in the luggage lounge of Zakynthos airport earlier this summer. Although I would have preferred not to have been calling around removal companies during my blended family holiday, the knowledge of moving house nevertheless stopped the holiday blues kicking in on our return to the UK, knowing we had only days to get packed and moved.

Banjo Robinson: A Review

On a grey, frosty October morning, thinking back to June this year feels like ages ago; but it was then that my daughter’s eyes lit up for the first time, when she saw a decorated blue and red envelope, addressed to her, sitting on the doormat one Saturday morning. Not knowing who it was from, she eagerly opened it. To her surprise it was from Banjo Robinson.

Caught Offside

For a second I could tell his life momentarily paused. He heard his name being called but didn’t know how to act. Turning pink, a grin emerged across his innocent face and his eyes widened with happiness. My boy had just been announced the coach’s player of the year for his football team.

Healing A Broken Boy

Underneath the window on a hot July day sat my son. His mother had just beckoned him into the front room, taking him away from his toy cars. Sunlight poured into the room from outside, with dust dancing in its rays, putting my son underneath a spotlight. The scene was set. And then she told him.

Blended Boundaries

Time froze. It stopped. My little girl looked at her big brother, then at me. My son stood still. For the first time that evening he was lost for words. And me?! Well I wasn’t sure what to do, how to feel or how to respond. However, it had to be done. It was entirely appropriate. Soon-To-Be was left with no choice but to tell my son off for the first time.

An Open Letter To My Children

Dear Kids,

Well, what a 2018 it’s been eh?! I can honestly say that it’s been one of the most interesting years of my entire life and sharing it with you two makes it perfect.

In fact, sharing any year with you guys is perfect.

I won’t lie, 2017 was pretty awful. Learning about your Mum’s affair, her leaving in the middle of the night out of the blue and Grandad’s battle with cancer, did leave me slightly battered at times, but with you two in my life those testing times were overcome with relative ease. When on the brink, nothing brings you back to earth like your son announcing he’s blocked the toilet or your daughter demanding I dance with her in the kitchen, before sulking when I don’t complete the splits.

To The Ex, From Step-Mum x

The biggest smile and cuddle I saw this Christmas was triggered from an unusual source. You’d think unwrapping numerous presents from under the tree would provoke the biggest grin from a child. You’d be forgiven for believing the promise of eating nothing but chocolate until the New Year would delight youngsters the most, or the fact school is closed for a fortnight.Christmas gives children numerous opportunities to be overwhelmingly happy, yet my son’s cheeriest smile came when I picked him up from his Mum’s in the afternoon of Christmas Day.

Ain’t no Party like a Blended Dad Party

Last Sunday started with my little girl waking up tired, grumpy and excitable all rolled into one. She was shattered because she was up late, owing to the fact that all her family from down south had come up for a weekend visit. She was grumpy because she had had to share a bed with her big brother, who had woken her up with his snoring and farting. And finally she was excited, simply because it was the day of her 5th birthday party.

However, whatever emotional pick-and-mix there was floating around in her head, it felt like nothing compared to the emotional waves I endured that morning. There were elements of dread, excitement, intrigue and black humour, swirling around my mind like clothes in a tumble drier.

It was the first time my little girl was to have a party as a primary school attendee, thus meaning all of her little school friends were going to be there. It was also the first time that my folks, sisters, brother-in-laws and nieces were all able to attend her special day at the same time. And finally, it was the first time my ex had seen my extended family since she got up and left one night 18 months ago.